The thought of starting a blog has never crossed my mind till today. Never understood why because I love to write, I’ve kept a diary for as long as I can remember. I usually just use notes on…
The thought of starting a blog has never crossed my mind till today. Never understood why because I love to write, I’ve kept a diary for as long as I can remember. I usually just use notes on…
So, I had good feedback for this.
I hope you enjoy.
Luke James for all those who couldn’t get him.
I hope you get him now.
Ella & Luke’s First Encounter – Luke’s POV.
Her butt is sticking to my dick, and it’s infuriating. I move the blonde away, accessing the damage from the night before.
Maybe it’s because of that ass that I wanted to fuck her. She is hot. I trail my fingers down her side and kiss her shoulder.
She deserves a man who’ll treat her well, and not have sex with her on the first date.
If only she knew I was a senior.
If only any college chick knew.
Sliding from the bed, I get dressed quickly, look back at her and walk away. Her student house is small, quiet.
I reach the sidewalk and climb into my Audi. I decide on making my way to my penthouse in downtown Charlotte.
Nickelback play loudly through my speakers as I drive to my home.
It’s so strange having my own place at eighteen. I don’t think my dad gives a fuck. He hasn’t since mom died. He just drinks his scotch and works every damn hour he can. I get that he has to work to live, but he’s worth billions. He doesn’t have to work at all. I know it’s the grief. The pain of losing mom so young. She was the most kind, loving, doting woman I ever knew. She’d be ashamed of who I had become.
I mentally remember to change, but I know it wont happen.
Everyday I promise myself a change, and everyday I break that promise.
Opening the door to my penthouse, a few letters are on the floor at my feet, and I pick up the one with the Princeton logo so firmly stamped on the bottom of the letter.
I got in.
I got in.
“I GOT IN!” I shout and laugh to myself. I immediately feel sad, the room filled with my echo and nobody to share my amazing news with. I slam the letter on the side, and go get ready for school.
“Jenna fucked that teacher, that’s why I dumped her, Ry.” I’m sat in the cafeteria, sipping on a coke and talking to my best bud Ryan.
He laughs. “Sorry man, but that is fucking hot. Shit, you’ve lost a good one there mate.”
I laugh back. “No I haven’t. I fucked this girl last night. She had this perfect mouth. Perfect for-“ I point to my crotch. “Well, you know what for.”
We laugh together, before I sit up and nearly choke on my coke. “Jenna.” I acknowledge and Ryan laughs at me. I glare at him.
“Baby,” She purrs and comes to sit with me. “I miss you.” Her teeth bite my earlobe and I almost give in and take her mouth right here. I push her away from me, and smirk at her.
“You lost me, Jenna. Or have you forgotten your encounter with the English teacher?”
“Shut the hell up, Luke! Not everyone knows about that.” She looks around and then at Ryan. “Say one word Jackson, and I’ll rip your dick off. Got it?”
Ryan holds his hands up in protest and she stands up, straightens her dress and leaves.
“I retract my last statement.” Ryan says. “You didn’t lose a good one, you lost a great one.”
I stand and punch his arm. “Shut up you dick.”
“Mr James, are you paying attention?” The principal, Mr Weiss, asks me.
I look up. “Yes, sir. I got my college acceptation this morning.”
He claps his hands together. “Well done, Luke! I bet your father is so proud.”
“He doesn’t know.” I say, deadpan.
“Why ever not?” He asks, and my anger accelerates.
“Because he wouldn’t give a shit. He doesn’t give a shit.” I pull my hood up and over the back of my head. “He doesn’t care Mr Weiss. Never has, never will.” I flex my knuckles, make a fist and shake out the tension. I want to punch this motherfucker.
“Luke James. How dare you talk to me that way! Don’t forget your father and myself are friends, and I will tell him that you’re behaviour is unacceptable. I would like you to leave please.”
“I’m sorry I thought I could actually come to you regarding my life. Clearly not. And for your information, I don’t give a fuck if you tell him. I got into Princeton, and that’s all I care about. I don’t care about you, or this school. I’ve already graduated, that’s it. I’m done.” I stand abruptly from my seat, and slam the door to his office behind me. I lean my head against the wall behind me and pull my hood back down. Fucking jerk. Fucking stupid idiotic jerk.
I hate this fucking place. The sooner I’m outta here the better.
I start towards the exit, desperate to leave and actually go home and find some other college party to gate crash. I need some girl for my dick.
I look down for a second before my whole life changes.
Her blue eyes melt into mine, just for a second and I immediately feel a force. Fuck me what is that?
“Sorry.” She mutters, and zips up her backpack. I know her, how do I know her?
“That’s okay.” I say, kindly, I need her eyes to look at me again. I need to feel that feeling. She looks up at me, and wipes under her eyes. Brunette hair is escaping onto her face from behind her hood. Her jeans wrap tight around her long legs, long legs that I…Shit fuck. That’s Ella Stone. No. Fucking. Way.
“Ella?” She looks startled. I’m worried about how easy her name just fell from my lips. “Are you okay? Have you been crying?” I move my hand toward her face but she backs off.
She’s beautiful, how did I never see this before?
“Um, I’m fine, just tired. Sorry, Luke.” She wipes her face again, and runs her sleeve under her nose. I just want to hold her. What the fuck is this stupid feeling? I need to shake her off.
“Don’t apologise, Ella. I wasn’t looking either.” The edge to my voice doesn’t go unnoticed and she licks her bottom lip. Fuck. Me. My dick twitches at her mouth. It’s so full and desperate to be kissed. I could fuck the hell outta that mouth.
I have to leave.
This is too much.
It doesn’t bother me that this girl has been bullied her whole life. I’ve just seen her raw, and it was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.
“See you, Ella, try to stop crying. Life is a mystery.” I smile down at her. Her eyes flutter closed for a second and reopen. Something fierce burns through, and I’m desperate to get to know her.
“Bye, Luke.” She whispers in a soft, desirable, sexy tone.
I watch her walk away. She is hot. Why have I never noticed before?
I’ve known Ella Stone from kindergarten to now. She’s always been in similar classes to me. We’ve always known of each other. So why did I never get to know her? Because I belonged with the popular crowd. I belonged with the bullies.
That has to change, starting today.
I’m sat in my Audi, tapping the steering wheel with a pen, waiting for her to leave school. I’ve gone stalker. I’ve been sat here an hour maybe? The bell went like five minutes ago and I’m getting real impatient.
I watch a bunch of kids leave, but it takes me all of seconds to spot her. She rushes to her car. It’s a blue Mustang, must be around thirty years old. Shit, she shouldn’t be driving that. But at least it’s a classic. I pull my rucksack from the passenger seat, and step out of the car. I lock it, and run over to where she is parked. Nickelback fills the parking lot, and I immediately like her all the more. She loves my favorite band. I run toward the end of the lot, and wait for her to drive down. She pull swiftly out of her space, and drives straight at me. I step out into the road, and panic when she doesn’t slow down. Shit is she looking down?
The car slams to a stop inches from my feet.
“SHIT!” She yells, and I smile at her. I watch her eyes skim over me, checking me out.
I stare intently into her angry eyes. “You have a knack for running into me today, huh, Ella?” I shake my head gently and walk around to the driver’s side. I have to be close to her. I squat down, and lean my arms on her door. “I don’t believe you’re okay, Ella, I mean that music for one, the lyrics are quite sad, right?” Why am I so bothered? The lyrics to Someday fill my ears. ‘Gunna make it alright but not right now.’
Her eyes are so angry, so full of passion. She smirks at me. He perfect lips lift up at one side and she tucks some hair behind her ear. I so want to do that.
“Not that it makes any difference to you, or me, or anyone. Just go away, Luke. I’m worthless. I’m told enough. I believe you said it to me once as well. I don’t have time for you.” She says it so matter of fact, I feel hurt. But she clearly does this as a defence. Not because she doesn’t want to talk to me.
I stand, and walk around to the passenger side. I open the door; fling my backpack onto her back seat, cringing at the duct tape lacing the leather.
I turn to face her.
She will talk to me.
I’ll make her.
“Luke, what are you doing?” She sounds furious; it’s such a turn on.
“Ella, let’s go somewhere, you and me.” I smile at her, remembering her features. She screws her nose up and it’s so cute, adorable. I mentally stop myself from feeling this way for her.
Her fingers wrap around the steering wheel. “I don’t know you, Luke. You are a stranger to me, why the hell would I go somewhere with you?”
“You know me well enough to know I won’t hurt or kill you, Ella.” I laugh, and secure my seat belt.
“Fine.” She says and slams her palms against the wheel. “Where do you wanna go?”
I smile. “Anywhere, somewhere we can just talk?”
“Luke, this makes no sense?”
“Just drive, Ella. Turn the music back up loud. Let’s go.”
I don’t know why I need to talk to her, but something has made me feel this intention and I sure as hell want to follow my gut.
She drives through Charlotte, until we reach the outskirts. She pulls over on the side of the road, and turns off the ignition.
“Why are we stopping?” I ask, confused as to where we are.
She lets out a soft sigh, and runs her palms up and down her jeans. She’s nervous. “This is one of my places, Luke, where I go to write. You want to talk? We can do it here. This is where I’m comfortable.”
“Okay, sure, let’s go.” I mutter, grab my backpack and climb out of the car. She’s walking in front of me as we walk down a small path toward a bridge. It’s beautiful down here. I watch her body move and it causes my dick to wake up. Fuck my life. Why is she so beautiful to me?
“This bench has been in my life for about five years. I ran away when I was 11.” She whispers so quietly. She’s acting like she’s scared of me.
I run my hand through my hair. “Why did you run away?” I ask.
“Because I was sad.” Her eyes drop to the floor, and she scuffs her feet.
“Like now?” I ask, and she nods.
“Come on, Ella, we only get one chance in life, okay? I’m here for you to talk to, to confide in. Maybe it’s a bit headstrong I admit, but I want to help you and I couldn’t shake the thought off all afternoon, since you stumbled into me looking like you did.” I laugh, and she lets a laugh out too.
It. Sounds. Fucking. Perfect.
I’ve gotta tell her. “You have a great laugh, Ella.” I smile at her, and her cheeks turn a shade of pink, and I close my eyes and open them at her. She’s completely new to this. We’re sat side by side on this damn bench and all I want to do is touch her. I move my fingers toward hers, but she pulls her hands into her lap and begins to weave them through each other. I’m desperate to know what’s going on in her mind.
She starts and I stop her. She needs reassurance.
“Ella, I’m here because I want to be. You need a friend that won’t destroy you, or your mind, someone who can help you through stuff. I need to be that for someone, I can’t explain why, but it won’t leave me alone, and you walking into me today opened that up for me.” I sigh.
“So, you just want to be my friend? Right?” She looks straight ahead.
Fuck. She’s hurt.
“Yes, Ella, I want to be your friend. Look at me.” She turns toward me; I pull her hood down from her head, and stare into her eyes for a few seconds before I pick up my backpack. I pull out a bottle of water and an old t-shirt.
“Hold still, close your eyes.” I pour a few drops of water onto the t-shirt and wipe it across her eyes, removing the black mess. I stare at her flawless skin, invading her as she’s letting me clean her up. I pull the t-shirt away and blue eyes pierce mine, sending a shoot of desire to my cock. Fuck.
I swallow back the arousal. “Now you look like you; you have beautiful eyes, Ella,” she sighs, and a soft smile appears on her lips.
“Thank you.” She says through a smile. Shit, I barely know this girl and I’ve got all these unmanly feelings.
“No problem, you owe me a new t-shirt though.” I joke and bump my shoulder with hers.
I put my T-shirt back in my backpack and look back at her. I can’t keep my eyes off her.
I move my hand again, and lay it on top of hers.
I immediately remove my hand. What the hell? My body felt like it was electrocuted.
I look at her and then down at my hands.
Change the subject, Luke.
“Ella,” I whisper. “You know when I asked you to turn the music back up loud? It’s because I wanted to know what songs you listen to. What lyrics make you feel sad-” She lifts up her small hand, and I stop talking immediately.
“The music doesn’t make me sad, Luke. It makes me think. The lyrics save me. The words sang in a song define my love with myself, with the world. I was in the mood for the music I put on in the car. You know? Someone you don’t know, singing to you, telling you about waves crashing, fires never burning out, love never ending. I like to believe it, sink into the words. Fall in love with a song for all the right reasons. Feel the music penetrate my heart, flow in my blood. Breathe in my lungs. I have an eclectic taste in music, it varies.”
I stare at her. Wow. She really does go deep. Deep…
I look down at the bench, at a quote written in black ink. “Ella, you have the same look in your eyes as I have. I feel the same way about music. It rules me.” I run a hand through my hair. “Music is love, Love is music, right?”
“Where did you get that from?” She asks, a question on her lips.
“Get what?” I ask, and smirk at her, she giggles.
“It’s written here, Ella.” I point to the quote, and she nods in recognition. Her fingers trace the letters.
“Luke, tell me about you, this can’t all be about me. Okay?” She asks me completely out of the blue. But I understand.
“Yeah sure, Ella. What do you want to know?” I give her a soft smile. She crosses her legs one over the other. She’s wearing converse. My God.
“What’s your favorite ice-cream?” I laugh.
“What’s yours?” I stop laughing and give her a smile.
“Cookies and Cream, this is about you, not me, remember? Favorite ice-cream please?” She smiles with her teeth, and I can see so much beauty it overwhelms me.
I have to kiss her, know her… but I cant. I’ll break her.
“Cookies and Cream.” I reply. Playing her game.
“Seriously?” She asks and frowns at me.
I gently stroke my fingers across her forehead, across the lines. “You know, you use more muscles in your face when you frown, more then when you smile. So, stop frowning. Smile, and yes, it’s my favorite.”
She stands and walks away from me. Wait, what? She sits at the edge of the river, sideways so she can still talk to me. I pull my cell from my pocket; I at least need her number.
“What do you want, Luke, seriously? We have just met and you want to be my friend. This isn’t the normal way to make friends. For some reason I have brought you here. Some subconscious, or something, has told me to, and here we are, talking about ice cream. When this morning, I couldn’t even get my hair straight, and I felt just as alone then as I do now. You can be here, but my mind seems to lack the knowledge of letting people in. I’m sorry, but I just can’t understand it.”
She’s so intelligent. I twirl my cell phone in my fingers and she sighs, so I put it back in my pocket.
“Ella,” I practically breathe. “I want to be your friend because earlier-when you bumped into me-” I swallow.
“What, Luke?” Her eyes are searching mine, even from this distance. It’s like she rips into me and bares my soul.
“I felt something I have never felt before. It felt like a current or something and it rushed through my body like lightening. Like an unstoppable force that just overpowered me.”
No going back now.
I’m worried I’ll get hurt, is that stupid? I mean twenty-four hours ago I was fucking some girl, now I’m trying to win some girl over? Not just some girl though. No. Not just some girl. I have to make her my girl.
But I’ll break her…. I can’t…. She already looks so broken…
She swallows and wipes her eyes again. “I felt it too, but we can’t be more then friends, Luke, it would destroy us.”
I can’t stand the distance anymore. I stand up and walk towards her. She looks nervous again. I don’t like that I make her nervous.
“Stand up.” I ask and she complies. I grab her small hand, and I shake my head. I shouldn’t be doing this. I’ll hurt her.
I need to stop.
I have to repeat this.
Give in to my mind.
Forget my body.
“This is wrong.” I whisper and pull her toward me. She smells fucking amazing. She’s a mixture of strawberry and body wash. I feel her breathe me in, and she begins to fight me off. It just feels so Goddamn right.
“Luke-” She whispers against my chest. “I can’t if you can’t.”
I don’t let go. I hold her, because it might be the only chance I get to. I don’t know if I can continue to do this. I can’t start a relationship with her. I wrap my arms tighter around her. I can feel her heart beating through her hoody. I affect her too…
You will hurt her, Luke.
“Ella.” I breathe in hard. “I can’t know you. This was a mistake.”
“Why can’t you know me?” She pushes me away, hurt the sole focus of her features.
“Ella, I-” I stop. I can’t finish. Her eyes are hurt.
“Luke, if you don’t want to know me, why lead me under false pretences? Who do you think you are, Luke? Do you do this a lot? Huh? Get girls to let their guards down and let you in. Luckily for me, I didn’t do it too soon. Go away, Luke.” She’s shouting at me. I step toward her, and she takes a step back and raises her hands in defeat.
She scoffs. “This is weird, right? We both feel something we shouldn’t, you much more than me, but if you don’t care, don’t. My heart is as fragile as glass, okay? It breaks easy. I can’t cope with a broken heart, Luke. I can barely cope right now. Go home, forget this, me, us. Forget my favorite ice cream. Forget my music quote. Forget our embrace. Forget this. Okay?”
Her eyes are laced with tears. No, I can’t let her feel this way.
I’ve hurt her so bad.
“I can’t hide from you. I can’t make you feel something you don’t. I can’t be your friend. That’s why this is wrong. I need to go home, Ella.” I walk back toward the bench, pick up my backpack and put it on my back. I look back at her, and stare into those intense aquamarine eyes.
I have to taste her… Even if it’s just once…
“Bye.” She whispers, and I can hear the cry begging to escape.
“Bye, Ella. Remember you’re beautiful, okay?”
She continues to strip me bare, and the sexual tension escalates.
She’s staring at my mouth. I look at her lips; desperate to taste them, lick at them, and bite them. I go to make a move and she stops me.
She kisses my cheek, completely off guard. Oh fuck, I can’t hold back.
“Maybe one day. When high school isn’t so complicated.” She whispers.
I grab the back of her head, and push her mouth against mine. I groan against her lips, the intense feeling back and drowning in our desire. I lick her bottom lip and she opens to me. Our tongues connect and become a dance. My dick hardens within seconds. I cup her jaw, and her fingers slip into my hair and pull me closer. She slows down, and eventually pulls away. I gasp at the coldness I feel when her lips leave mine.
“Luke, no, we can’t.” She whispers so innocently.
Of course she’s fucking right.
I rest my forehead on hers, and then I make the biggest mistake of my life.
I walk away from the most amazing girl I’ve ever met.
Life sometimes just burns it way into your day and you can’t stop it!
Never Say Goodbye has had incredible feedback from people all over the world my heart = done.
This made me so happy, knowing I had impacted peoples lives in such a way, and they trusted me with their hearts if only for a little while.
Always And Forever has huggeee demand. I’m writing it as much as I can when I can.
It’s hard though, especially working five days a week! But i’m hoping for a release THIS year.
Just because I felt I had too.
Sometimes, in this life, we face walls.
Walls of steel, walls of cement.
These walls stop us from focusing on that that matters the most, the keep us out, away from the emotion of happiness. They tear you down; you’re strong exterior, and watch the life slowly leave you.
They don’t care. They could never care.
You bash your fists, hard against the steel, the coldness hitting you first, before the heat of your blood pours from your poor, helpless hands.
You hold them in front of you, irritation seeping into your system.
You want to hold your mother; you want to tell her you love her no matter what.
But that doesn’t matter. Not now, not now this is here.
Where did this come from? Why is it stopping me from wanting to live anymore?
You look down at your blooded, shredded hands, and back up at the fifteen-foot wall stopping you from getting what you want.
You curse at it, fight at it with all you have.
But you’re a weeping mess on the floor.
Blood is drenching you in pain, in misery.
You clutch at your heart, which is now an empty muscle, desperate to get it beating for life again, but it can’t. It won’t.
Why wont it fight? Why won’t it tell me to live for everything?
The rope has become friendly now, that same rope that you’ve had hidden under your bed for months.
You can hear your family downstairs, enjoying the day, laughing, and joking.
Yet you’re here, fighting with a wall.
You get angry.
Nothing matters anymore.
Where have the years gone? Why don’t they mean anything anymore?
Why doesn’t my family matter to me anymore?
You grab the rope, escape into the loft, and tie it deftly, quickly, to the beam above you.
You stare down at your bedroom floor.
The demons are laughing at you, telling you you’re worthless, lifeless.
You’re a nothing.
You wrap your fingers around the rope, the last item you will ever feel.
This is it.
Your feet think before your mind does, and light paralyzes you.
You feel your soul leave your body, staring at the broken mess. Before meeting its maker someplace else.
You look at the shell you were, your body, hanging from a rope, your neck broken, your eyes lifeless.
You see your sister find you, she falls to her knees, fear, shock, emotion floods her system, before she calls for help.
You try reach out to her, to your mother who is now calling an ambulance.
But you can’t feel them; all you can feel is the cold.
You drift away with your memories, with your heart now stopped, toward what you hoped, would be a better life.
HERE IT IS.
Your Little Secret’s Cover!
Massive thanks to Cover it! Designs. (ARIJANA <3)
Amber Watson thought she knew what she wanted in life – a house that didn’t have creaky stairs and leaky taps; a home with the perfect guy and an undying love that stole her breath away. Between her boyfriend, Connor, and her best friend, Ethan, she thought she had the perfect life and the perfect future only a heartbeat away.
That is until abandonment and need begin to overwhelm her.
When Connor takes a job in London, Amber finds herself slipping at his lack of contact and the uneasy feeling that he’s hiding more from her than he says.
Thanks for taking the time to have a look, leave a comment & ADD TBR! ❤
Beth’s Author Page –https://www.facebook.com/BethanCooperAuthor
Kirsty’s Author Page – https://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Kirsty-Anne-Still/524455580934384?fref=ts
Your Little Secret’s Page – https://www.facebook.com/pages/Your-Little-Secret/145166389003264?fref=ts
Goodreads Link – http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17974035-your-little-secret
Cover Designer’s link (Cover It! Designs) –https://www.facebook.com/CoverItDesigns?fref=ts
1000 Facebook Likes!!!
Thank you guys SO MUCH for all the support you’ve given me and my blog! I can’t tell you how much I enjoy doing this! I love chatting with you daily about all the amazing books out there! Thank you for taking the time to comment, post, and interact with me everyday! ♥
There are TWO giveaways… so 2 rafflecopters to enter!
10 WINNERS WILL BE CHOSEN!
Enter to win 1 of 6 signed paperbacks or 4 ebook gifts!
Paperbacks are U.S. only and ebooks are for Nook or Kindle, open internationally.
Giveaway ends Friday, May 10th at 8:00 p.m. CST
View original post 16 more words
Never Say Goodbye! 🙂
After a long time and hopes of a certain date that I NEEDED to be mine, I’ve found someone has that date & I can’t steal thunder now can I?
So me and my editor are working to have it completely edited and done by the beginning of July.
The release date for my debut novel is
The day it’ll go live…. GULP.
I’ve fallen into this book,it’s takenme 9 months but I did it.
I put my mind to it and completed a novel.